


Stay

by newt_scamander



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Heartache, Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-09
Updated: 2016-01-09
Packaged: 2018-05-12 19:58:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 663
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5678686
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/newt_scamander/pseuds/newt_scamander
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>inspired by mayday parade</p>
    </blockquote>





	Stay

**Author's Note:**

> inspired by mayday parade

“We can’t do this anymore.” 

Ren looked up, his eyebrows knit together in confusion. “What?” 

The illusion was slipping, Hux was pulling away and pulling his gloves on and sliding the crop back into his coat. “This- we can’t do it anymore. People are starting to talk.” 

“What? Who cares?” Ren shook his head. “They’re just foot soldiers, none of them matter.” 

“Some of them are employed under my father and you know it. If a one reports to him about this-” Hux shook his head. “I would be finished.” 

No, no, no. 

“We’ll be more discreet.” Ren suggested, turning around and looking at him. 

“No. We have to end it. Today. Now.” 

“Hux, no.” Ren shook his head. “No, you can’t. I can’t.” 

“I can do whatever I bloody well please, it’s my ship.” Hux said sharply.

“Please.” Ren reached for him, hoping it was only a dream- a nightmare in truth. 

“Don’t grovel. You’re a grown man, Ren. I don’t have time for this.” Hux pushed his hand away. 

“You promised.” His voice was breaking now, his fingers trembling. “You said you loved me.”

“Well, I never meant it to go this long. It was only for you to get control and now you’ve done it. Problem solved.” He ignored the last words, tucking his cap on his head. 

“I- I don’t have control. I don’t know- Hux, please.” 

Suddenly he was a boy again, his mother sending him to his Uncle for Jedi training and he was pulling on her skirt but she pushed him from the transporter and he was in the dirt, crying and Luke wouldn’t comfort him- he couldn’t breathe. 

When his eyes opened again he was alone, all traces of Hux removed from the room they had come to share. All traces of the man Ren had fallen so desperately in love with. 

\---

 

The maintenance bill sky-rocketed in the next few weeks, along with the amount of beds in the med bay. And Hux ignored it all. 

Ren was trying, trying, to keep it together but he was failing. He had hoped that good behavior would bring Hux back- maybe he was tired of being so controlling. Ren could do it, he could take care of himself. But he couldn’t. Everything set him off and his saber was always so handy- there was nothing he could do. 

Then he found a store of dark amber liquid in the supply closet and his lightsaber only missed destroying it. But he saved it. And it helped. 

It blurred everything around the edges and he couldn’t remember if it had been one month or two without Hux or what color his eyes were or the way his voice sounded, the way he said it. Ben. 

He didn’t try to hide it, the crystal bottles following him everywhere. He always had one. He had to. 

On the fifth day of the third month without Hux- not that Ren remembered, as he was in a spirit induced slumber- Hux let himself into his quarters, half expecting to find Ren plotting world domination. Or slashing something. Not this, never this. Ren was too strong. 

Evidently not. 

“Come on, Ren.” Hux whispered, tugging the bottle away. 

“No. Stop it.” He slurred. His fingers coiled back around the bottle and he went to take another swig but Hux dumped it on his head.

“No more, Benjamin.” Hux said sharply, pulling him into a shaky standing position. Ren was taller than him, as always, but he was clinging to him and burying his face in the general’s neck. 

“Smells like Hux.” Ren whispered. 

“It’s me. I’m here, now. Everything is alright.” 

“No. No it’s not.” Ren yelled, shoving away from Hux. “No, I’m just dreaming.” 

“No, Ren. I’m here now, I promise.” Hux pulled him back again and let Ren bury his face in his neck. 

“Don’t leave me.” Ren pleaded. 

“Never again.” 

When Ren woke, Hux was holding him. He’d been there all night.


End file.
